He didn't want to be a table. But here we are, and honestly? He's perfect at it.
The Squidward Table is a 100cm full-size Squidward figurine holding a glass table top — detailed resin, aggressively large, and the kind of furniture that tells your guests exactly who you are the moment they walk in. It is a side table. It is also a whole personality. Both things are completely true.
Your living room was fine before. It's significantly better now.
